My essays about healthy relationships with God, others, & yourself.

Category: Christian Perspective (Page 3 of 3)

How ESPN has improved my prayer life.

Private prayer is something that I am determined to make a priority in my life.   I’ve blogged before about how I organize my prayer life but I’ve never blogged about finding the right environment for prayer.

We know from scripture that Jesus often withdrew to “lonely places” to pray and he also taught the concept of finding a “prayer closet” in which to get alone with God.  Over the years I’ve found various prayer closets that worked well, but I want to share about one that I’ve found especially helpful over the past year.

I love to run on treadmills at the iGym, but it with my busy schedule it’s hard to justify much time for that.  The thought occurred to me that if I could learn to pray while running I’d be doing two really good things at the same time.  Redeeming the time!

So, more days than not, after some time in the Word I’ve started driving to the gym for my prayer time.  It was a admittedly a bit distracting at first, but over time I’ve learned to block everything out around me and focus completely on my conversations with God.    As you would expect, I select the treadmill which is under the ESPN TV screen (which doesn’t tempt me to look up in the least!)  I also put on noise cancelling ear protectors to block out all the gym noise.  Then I put my phone on “airplane mode,” and set it up on the tray with my prayer app open (described previously), and then launch into a focused session of prayer.

My goal is to meditate through my prayer list while running as fast as I reasonably can — without losing concentration.  If I start to think about my running, I slow down.  Over time my treadmill has become my sacred space.   Here I’ve lifted up the needs of others while also receiving joy, guidance, conviction, inspiration and even brokenness. One day my spirit was so troubled by circumstances that it took me 10 miles to calm my restless heart!   As strange as it may seem, my treadmill has truly has transformed into a sanctuary.

And here’s an extra bonus:  I never get sleepy when I pray!

I share all this not to recruit anyone to pray in a gym but rather to encourage each of you to find your own private place — wherever that might be — to meet regularly with God in prayer.  Make time with Him a priority in your daily schedule!

The surprising lesson I learned from Lexi’s trip to Italy.

Lexi in ItalyOver Spring Break Lexi went to Northern Italy with the UNI Wind Symphony.   She had a wonderful time playing the saxophone which she loves, getting to know her bandmates, and enjoying a new part of the world she’d never seen.

Her social role within the band quickly became that of a cheerleader.  Whenever enthusiasm would wane or boredom would creep in Lexi would pipe up, “Guys, guess what!  WE’RE in ITALY!  Aren’t you EXCITED!!” and that would return everyone’s focus to the amazing reality of their situation.

Lexi was simply reminding her friends of a truth that they already knew but had lost sight of.  Any instances of boredom or lackluster attitudes were merely the result of forgetting what an awesome place they were in.  Her animated reminders brought them back to reality and quickly helped them regain their excitement.

I think we need a similar reminder when it comes to our relationship to God.  It’s easy for our devotional life to become mundane and boring.  Why?  Because just like Lexi’s bandmates we’ve forgotten the amazing reality of our situation and we need to be reminded of what’s true.

“Guys, guess what!  WE’RE INVITED TO HAVE A PRIVATE, FACE-T0-FACE MEETING EACH DAY WITH THE CREATOR OF THE ENTIRE UNIVERSE!! HE WANTS TO SPEND TIME WITH YOU.  Aren’t you EXCITED!”

I’ve been contemplating this ever since Lexi shared about her trip and it has surprisingly transformed my approach to God.

What if I actually started living out what I know to be true?  What if I started to view spending time with God in the same way I would if I was being invited to have breakfast with a celebrity?  Would I hit the snooze button five more times if a head of state was waiting for me at my breakfast table?  Wouldn’t I go to bed early the night before if I had a breakfast appointment with a famous person, and if I were to wake up in the night wouldn’t I be counting the hours?  Wouldn’t I be excited when my alarm went off, no matter how early it was?  Wouldn’t sluggishness and boredom be unthinkable?  Wouldn’t I view my time with this celebrity as a humbling privilege rather than a chore?

By reflecting on such questions over the past months I can honestly say that I have enjoyed my early morning times with God more than ever before.  There have been many mornings when I have bounded out of bed to spend some quality time getting to know God deeper through His Word and prayer.

But it’s easy to forget what’s true.

And so just as Lexi’s enthusiasm reminded her bandmates of what they knew to be true, may this blog post remind you and me of what a privilege it is to be invited to meet each day with the Creator of the universe.

Lexi italy

 

 

Why I believe in “Intelligent Faith.”

IFC newlogo w boxOne of the saddest things is to see people blindly embracing belief systems without any supporting evidence.  God gave us minds to use and to not do so would be about as ridiculous as a person with good eyes living with blindfolds on.  To not use what God gives would be a waste of His good gifts.

But some would argue — as I did in my satirical April Fools joke yesterday –that faith and reason are incompatible.  As if certain things are matters of faith, whereas other things belong to the realm of reason.  I want to challenge that argument.  I would assert that faith and reason need to work together.

But first I need to define what I’m talking about when I use the term faith.  Many skeptics think blind faith is the only kind of faith.  Blind Faith is believing something without any rational evidence, such as believing that the moon is made of cheese.

I agree with the skeptics that this kind of faith is an unfortunate waste of grey matter.

But I’m going to suggest there is another kind of faith — Intelligent Faith.

Intelligent Faith has three components.

  1. a subject to consider (a chair, for example)
  2. a rational assessment resulting in a belief about that subject (the chair appears to be able to hold my body weight)
  3. committing to that belief  (actually sitting in the chair, i.e. exercising faith.)

You’ll notice that reason itself has limitations.  Even in our simple example, there’s a slight element of uncertainty in step 2 — the chair “appears” to be sturdy.  There is no absolute certainty that my chair will indeed hold my body weight — the wood may be rotten inside, the glue may be old, an earthquake may occur as I’m starting to sit down, etc.  So we don’t make decisions based on absolute certainty, but rather reasonable evidence.  Reasonable evidence is all a jury is asked to utilize in convicting someone — absolute certainty is never expected.  We all step out in faith based on reasonable evidence.  Faith fills the gap that reason alone leaves us.

So to put it succinctly:  Reason assesses; Faith trusts. There is no conflict.  Both are essential components needed to live life each day.

We all need to practice intelligent faith every day.  It’s how we decide whether or not to cover our roses after the weatherman’s frost alert.  It’s how we decide what we will allow ourselves to eat or not eat.  It’s how we decide what’s worth living for, fighting for, and dying for.  And what we believe happens after that.

Why the Starbuck’s cups would have offended me.

fox_and_friends_first_-war_on_christmas_starbucksRecently the Starbucks “red cup controversy” made the headlines as it was purported by some to be a “war on Christmas”.  I personally think it was mostly a publicity stunt, as I know of exactly ZERO Christians (and I know a lot!) who were concerned about it.

But it does remind me of my own journey.  Until a few years ago I too might have been offended by such Starbuck’s cups — along with other Christmas trappings that exclude any mention of Jesus.  So for those who haven’t heard my story, let me share what brought me out of Grinchiness.

I wrote the following in Jan, 2008…


 

Anyone who has been around me this Christmas knows that I’ve had quite a change of perspective with regard to Christmas. For the past couple of years I’ve had this ever increasing negative attitude, bemoaning the secular “X-Mas” along with its assault on the spiritual “Christmas.” After all, Santa is spelled with the same letters as Satan!

I was disturbed at how the true meaning of Christmas (Jesus’ birth) is so often obscured by frivolous holiday trappings (decorations, ornaments, trees, the obsession with materialism, and of course, Santa). They’re taking Christ out of Christmas!

My attitude hit an all-time low in early December [2007] when I found myself at odds with my own family. They had the audacity of wanting me to join in the annual decorating of our home, setting up our tree, stringing the lights, etc. My preference was to throw the wicked tree in the recycle bin and go to my room to read the Nativity story instead!

Fortunately, my friend Steve Duffy sent me an email just in the nick of time (no christmaspun intended). It was a 17 page summary of a book on the history of Christmas. I was captivated — to the extent that I immediately bought the book and absorbed myself in it.

The book, Christmas: a Candid History, by Bruce David Forbes, a professor at Morningside College, put it all in perspective for me and transformed my attitude completely. I recommend it for any of you remaining Scrooges or Grinches out there. Here are the things I came to understand.

  1. There is no record that the early church ever even celebrated the birth of Christ at all for the first three centuries. (The Death and Resurrection were their big celebrations.)
  2. Only 4 chapters in the whole Bible mention any details of His birth.
  3. Even so, the season of His birth was never indicated, nor was any commandment ever given about recognizing it in any way.
  4. Midwinter celebrations (like Saturnalia, New Years, and the Winter Solstice) had been held since long before the time of Christ as a way to bring cheer to a dark, gloomy season of shortened days (in the northern hemisphere). These popular celebrations were characterized by greenery (holly, mistletoe, poinsettas), gift giving, lights and feasting along with a lot of raucous partying.
  5. After Constantine legalized Christianity, church leaders added a celebration of Jesus’ birth to these Mid-Winter festivals in an attempt to “Christianize” the festivities and tame the revelry.  (Had they tried to cancel them outright they would have faced stiff opposition.)  December 25th was designated as the day to recognize His birth, adding new traditions to the winter festivities.
  6. Therefore the spiritual aspect to the holidays has always been an “add-on” to a mostly secular cultural phenomenon.
  7. Interestingly, the Puritans almost succeeded in killing Christmas between the 1600s to 1800s, making the point that it wasn’t observed by the earliest church fathers.  Christmas thus fell out of public acceptance.  Their influence is shown by the fact that Congress and public schools were still meeting on Christmas day until 1850!
  8. Just as interestingly, Charles Dickens’ short story, “The Christmas Carol,” and Queen Victoria’s elaborate royal family traditions were instrumental in bringing Christmas back to popularity — this time with a new emphasis on families and children. Shortly after that, legends of St. Nickolas began to morph into today’s concept of Santa Claus largely through the poem “T’was the Night Before Christmas, ” which added to this new focus on children, toys, and gift-giving.
  9. Capitalism, higher standards of living, and advancements in technology have naturally and understandably increased the consumer emphasis of all of our holidays, including Christmas.

 

All these facts helped me realize that my thinking about Christmas was skewed. I learned that there’s nothing inherently wrong with enjoying a winter “holiday” with all it’s cultural trappings. And I learned that “true meaning of Christmas” wasn’t predominantly about Jesus’ birth at all. Instead of looking at the glass as half empty, I’m now looking at it as half full, rejoicing at how much Jesus remains a part of an otherwise secular season.

I rejoice that (for now anyways)…

• The name “Christ” in Christmas is still largely a part of the our holiday culture.
• Christmas carols, some clearly proclaiming the gospel message, have endeared themselves to our culture and are commonly enjoyed in public stores, holiday concerts, and on secular radio.
• Nativity sets, reminding the world about the incarnation, are commonplace and culturally acceptable.
• Jesus is thought about and talked about more during this season than any other time of year.
• TV and news specials about Jesus, Bethlehem, etc are common and generally positively portrayed.
• Church attendance at Christmastime has become a cultural family tradition for many–even the irreligious.
• Charity and unselfish giving are great values during this season—affording opportunities to share about God’s generous nature.


 

Since I stopped being a Grinch about Christmas eight years ago, I can honestly say that I thoroughly enjoy the holiday season, red cups and all!

My crazy story of God’s mercy.

Yesterday I had a crazy encounter with God’s mercy.

I typically give plasma on Wednesday mornings before going to work.  Since it’s chilly in the plasma center when I go there I wear a special down sleeveless jacket to keep me warm, with just my arms exposed.   I keep this jacket in the backseat of my car.  Yesterday, as usual, I went into the garage, opened the car’s back door, put on my jacket, got in the front seat, and drove the mile and a half to Biolife.

I parked in the first row and went in and, again, as is typical, had a successful donation.  But when I returned to the parking lot 75 minutes later, I was SHOCKED to find my laptop sitting on top of my car!  I was horrified and stunned to realize that I had set my laptop on the roof of my car in my garage when I was retrieving my jacket.  I had completely forgotten about it!  I drove the mile-and-a-half without it falling off, and then it sat there on top of my car for 75 minutes without getting stolen by the many passers-by.  This was a miraculous encounter, which to me is a perfect demonstration of God’s mercy.

Mercy is when we do not receive the negative consequences that we deserve.   By all accounts, my negligence should have resulted in my laptop being shattered on the roadways or stolen.  (Btw, on many other occasions I have received penalties for my negligence such as sending iPhones through the washing machine multiple times!)  But this time God showed me great favor so I didn’t end up getting what I deserved.

While I’m on the subject, closely related to mercy is another biblical term called grace.  Grace involves receiving a blessing that is completely undeserved.

I like to visualize the relationship between mercy and grace using the illustration of an elevator.  Mercy is like an elevator when it raises us up out of the curses we deserve down below.  Grace is the same elevator when it takes us up to levels of undeserved blessing.

The Importance of Showing Affection in Marriage

This past week, my daughter Lexi randomly discovered “The Brady Bunch” on YouTube. She’s quickly become addicted to it–but this is one of the better addictions; it offers wonderfully clean, and wholesome entertainment compared to what is so often dished out by Hollywood today.

Watching the Bradys is like traveling in time back to my childhood — in fact, I was about my girls’ age when I used to watch it every day after school. (I admit, I was crushing on Marcia.)  It’s been a delight to revisit these shows, laughing with my girls and talking about the relative simplicity of life in the 70s.  Yes, corded phones used to be attached to the wall!  

One thing that stands out about the the Brady Bunch is the level of affection shown by Mike and Carol. It’s obvious that they are in love, nuzzling and flirting all the time — even in front of the kids. But nobody blushes — in fact, the kids relish their parents’ mutual delight nearly as much as Mike and Carol do. The affection of their parents seems to add to the well-being and security of their home.

Which is exactly the point I wish to make.

Today, we live in a world where marriage is breaking down before our eyes. We might blame the secular culture for devaluing and redefining marriage, but perhaps the greatest hindrance is the lack of healthy marriages being modeled.  Our kids are subtly being taught something about marriage every day.

Think of the messages they get from television and movies: sensual delight is found primarily outside of marriage and marriage will limit your options — almost like going to prison. Married people have to “settle down” and stop having fun. Bachelor parties have become like the Mardi Gras before the dreaded season of Lent. No wonder kids today don’t value marriage!

Christian parents are not exempt.   Do we who are married show our kids that marriage is a delight or do they see it as more of a contractual arrangement where the parents simply co-exist?

Why might Christian parents neglect to show affection in front of their kids?   I can think of three reasons.

First. Is it in hopes that our kids won’t think about sex? Too late, they already do! God has given them massive amounts of hormones and they’re trying to figure out what they’re for. We’ve got to show them that the proper context for drives, affections, and sensuality is in marriage — otherwise they’ll begin to seek the fulfillment of these things in all the wrong places.

Second. Is it because showing affection is out of our comfort zone? I realize that your background, personality, ethnicity, circumstances etc. affect your comfortability with showing affection, but I suggest that nevertheless it must be shown. It may take getting used to and you may observe some eye-rolling at first, but it will impact your family for the better. My kids have gotten used to us snuggling on the couch; they see us holding hands; they catch my cheesy pickup lines some nights before bedtime, and they hear me tease about wanting a “transparent shower curtain” in our bathroom for my birthday. They groan at this last one of course, but through it all, they learn that their parents’ affection is genuine and secure, which makes the whole family feel secure. And in the process, they learn what marriage is meant to be, hopefully wanting that for themselves one day.

Third. Is it because we honestly don’t have any affection for our spouse? If this is the case then the best thing you can do for your kids is to sprint directly into marriage counseling. Affection isn’t negotiable. It’s not the icing on the cake of marriage it is the cake itself. Marriage is ALL about the quality of the relationship. As far as it depends on you, do whatever is possible to get help with your marriage. I would be glad to chat with any of you about how to get help in this area.

Guilt. Lastly, I fear some of you will read this and simply feel guilty because you’re not able to model a healthy, affectionate marriage to your kids. Perhaps you’re a single parent or you’re stuck in a marriage where — due to circumstances beyond your control — affection is simply not going to be a reality. I want you to know that God is big enough to overcome your situation! He’s so good at working in spite of us. Trust Him. Pray that your kids will see healthy marriages modeled in the lives of other mentors. (That’s why I require my youth group volunteer couples to show PDA in youth group.) Perhaps your unfortunate situation will be used positively to give your kids a thirst for what you yourself long for. God’s not limited by anything. Trust Him.

And for some of you perhaps the first step would be to watch a couple reruns of the Brady Bunch!

 

Join Me For Breakfast

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I’ve decided that I need to improve my daily devotional life by adding some structure. Since Pastor Bob is about to start his sermon series on Romans 9-11, I thought that would be a good thing to study on my own each morning.

So, beginning today and continuing every single day [hopefully] for the five weeks, I’m going to begin each day having a little spiritual breakfast. I’m following the schedule that Bob has suggested, with Saturday being a review day and Sunday introducing the passage on which his sermon will be based.

I’m going to spend time digging in deep, reading and contemplating the passages and journaling my thoughts here on my blog.

I don’t presume that any of you would want to join me in this journey. But if any of you also need structure and would want to go on this journey with me on some of these days, that would be wonderful. I’d love it if you posted some of your own comments on the day’s passage–we could learn from each other!

Here’s the reading schedule I’m following.
I’m going to print it out and make a bookmark!

Series Title– “Exchange: Relationship”

Week 1 – Gaining a Right Perspective, part 1″
Sun, Feb 1 Rom 9:1-13
Mon, Feb 2 Rom 9:1-2
Tue, Feb 3 Rom 9:3-5
Wed, Feb 4 Rom 9:6-7
Thu, Feb 5 Rom 9:8-9
Fri, Feb 6 Rom 9:10-13
Sat, Feb 7 Rom 9:1-13 review

Week 2 – “Gaining a Right Perspective, part 2”
Sun, Feb 8 Rom 9:14-18
Mon, Feb 9 Rom 9:14
Tue, Feb 10 Rom 9:15
Wed, Feb 11 Rom 9:16
Thu, Feb 12 Rom 9:17
Fri, Feb 13 Rom 9:18
Sat, Feb 14 Rom 9:1-18 review

Week 3 – God’s Justice
Sun, Feb 15 Rom 9:19-33
Mon, Feb 16 Rom 9:19-21
Tue, Feb 17 Rom 9:22-24
Wed, Feb 18 Rom 9:25-26
Thu, Feb 19 Rom 9:27-29
Fri, Feb 20 Rom 9:30-33
Sat, Feb 21 Rom 9:1-33 review

Week 4 – “The Only Road to Righteousness”
Sun, Feb 22 Rom 10:1-13
Mon, Feb 23 Rom 10:1-2
Tue, Feb 24 Rom 10:3-4
Wed, Feb 25 Rom 10:5-8
Thu, Feb 26 Rom 10:9-10
Fri, Feb 27 Rom 10:11-13
Sat, Feb 28 Rom 9:1-10:13

Week 5 – “Without Excuse”
Sun, Mar 1 Rom 10:14-21
Mon, Mar 2 Rom 10:14-15
Tue, Mar 3 Rom 10:16-17
Wed, Mar 4 Rom 10:18
Thur, Mar 5 Rom 10:19
Fri, Mar 6 Rom 10:20-21
Sat, Mar 7 Rom 9:1-10:21 review

Week 6 – “There’s Always Hope”
Sun, May 3 Rom 11:1-24
Mon, May 4 Rom 11:1-6
Tue, May 5 Rom 11:7-10
Wed, May 6 Rom 11:11-16
Thu, May 7 Rom 11:17-20
Fri, May 8 Rom 11:21-24
Sat, May 9 Rom 11:1-24 Review

Week 7 – “Our Great and Glorious God”
Sun, May 17 Rom 11:25-36
Mon, May 18 Rom 11:27-27
Tue, May 19 Rom 11:28-32
Wed, May 20 Rom 11:33-34
Thu, May 21 Rom 11:35
Fri, May 22 Rom 11:36
Sat, May 23 Rom 11:25-36 Review

"Sacred Pathways"

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On our Winter Retreat, our teaching theme presented the “Sacred Pathways” described in the book by the same name by Gary Thomas.   I’m going to summarize the book here so parents will know what we talked about, but I also think every believer would benefit spiritually by learning the insights presented in this book.

 So here’s a quick overview to clue you in.

Gary Thomas is one of my very favorite authors.  He is, a marvelous church historian who gleans spiritual gems from the forefathers of our faith and puts them in easy to understand language.  In his historical research, he has identified nine spiritual “temperaments” or ways that people are wired to best love and connect with God.  Knowing how you’re wired to worship helps you experience God in more meaningful ways.

The nine pathways are

  • The NATURALIST — worships God through experiencing God’s creation
  • The SENSATE— worships God through the five senses (sight, sound, touch, smell, & taste)
  • The ENTHUSIAST — worships God expressively through joyful passion and expectation.
  • The INTELLECTUAL— worships God by studying Truth and establishing firm beliefs.
  • The TRADITIONALIST— worships God by enjoying historic practices of the church, symbols, creeds, and hymns.
  • The ASCETIC— worships God by living a life of simplicity, solitude, and self-denial.
  • The CONTEMPLATIVE— worships God by meditating on an intimate, loving, personal relationship with Him.
  • The CAREGIVER — worships God by loving and serving others.
  • The ACTIVIST— worships God by making efforts to change the world.

All the “pathways” are valid and necessary in the church.  We’ll each have several that are dominant–and knowing that helps us to avoid judging others’ ways of worshiping.  It also helps to know that it’s ok for me to worship in a way that may be different from others.

It’s also useful to try other pathways to expereince God in new ways.  During the retreat after presenting each pathway in detail we had a time to experience each one (nature prayer walks, contemplation, reading a CS Lewis piece, etc.)

I’d encourage parents of retreat attenders to sit down and talk about your son or daughter’s pathways.  It would be a great way for you to get to know them better.

For the same reason, I presented this material at the Parents of Teens class two weeks ago.  Click here for the chart I passed out there, which explains the nine pathways in more detail if you’re interested!  sacred-pathways-overview.pdf

Click here if you’d like to take the simple Assessment Quiz that I shared with the group. Sacred Pathways Quiz

By the way, in case you’re wondering about my pathway mix–I’m an Ascetic, and a Contemplative, who’s becoming more and more of a Traditionalist!  That explains my previous post below!

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